This year has been very difficult for Cory and I as well as for our immediate and extended family due to numerous health issues and the topic of discussion today.

I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to speak rather candidly in this post.

As many of you know, Cory lost his grandmother and his step brother this past year.  It’s never easy to lose someone you love, especially a grandmother or sibling you grew up with.

This past weekend, we were hit with these emotions again, as we grieved the loss of one of our daughter’s best friends, mother and two siblings in a fatal car accident.

Nothing is quite as painful as watching your child mourn.  If only we could remove her pain…

As a way to help her process her grief, we had her write an anger letter, utilize our encounter stick on our anger pad, and process through Gestalt chair exercises, etc.

While this will never fully heal the pain she is experiencing, we are thankful we have these tools to help her through this difficult time.

The worst part of this tragedy is the father who has been left behind.

Words cannot describe the loss he is feeling, nor can mere words help ease his pain in any way.

Our only reassurance is that his family is now in the presence of their Creator.

Nothing brings life into perspective quite like death.

Death is a grave reminder to us to demonstrate love toward our family and friends each and every day as though it may be our last.

If you have been arguing with your spouse, teenager, friend or family member, maybe you can decide today to be the mature one-apologize first and reconcile!

Tell them all the things you would say if today was your last day.

Things are different for our family this week.

We are saying “goodbye” and “I love you” more often than ever.

But why can’t we always be so loving with each other?

Why does it take tragedy for us to be transparent and authentic with each other?

I believe one of the most loving things you can do for your family is to plan and prepare for your burial now.

For those of you who have read 301 Dating Ideas, Cory suggests this as one of his dating ideas.

My father had a terminal illness for over 15 years, and not once did he and my mother ever plan his memorial service or burial.

As a daughter, it was extremely painful to watch my mother make all the arrangements after he passed.

For those of you who are able, I would highly encourage you to consider doing this on an upcoming date/family night.

I know it seems like a horrendous thought right now, but I truly believe it will be easier for you now rather than later.

Cory knows what song I want played at my memorial service, and I know he wants bag pipes played.

We know where we want to be buried when that day arrives.

There is some reassurance in knowing what the other prefers.

All I know for sure at this moment is that God can turn our ASHES INTO BEAUTY.

I know He has great things in store for this weekend during the memorial service for this precious family.

I know the lives of these four individuals has and will continue to impact this generation as well as future generations to come because of their love and heart for Christ.

Their servant kindness did not go unnoticed, and all who knew them are thankful they did.

This week, some may even commit their lives to Christ because of their positive influence.

I hope they enjoy watching the seeds they planted come to fruition, as they witness the harvest of their labor here on earth.

God works all things together for good for those who love Him – even when it may not feel like it.

Kerry Schortzman, Director of Operations

Kerry Schortzman, Director of Operations

Kerry Schortzman is the Director of Operations at Transformed Hearts Counseling Center as well as an author and speaker. She has traveled the road of recovery alongside her husband through the wildfires of intimacy anorexia. She has a heart and passion to see healing and restoration in relationships and marriages as well as to bring public awareness to eliminate sex and human trafficking. Kerry has been married since 1998 and lives in Colorado with her husband and four daughters. She and Cory have been seen on the CBS Early Show, Inside Edition, and ABC Good Morning America, Fox 21 News, and TLC/Discovery discussing the harm of sex addiction and the joys of recovery.

Cory’s books include: Out of the Darkness, Into the Light the Workbook, Into the Light the Steps, Ashes to Beauty the Steps, 301 Dating Ideas, 301 Conversational Ideas, 301 Ways to Say I Love You, 301 Ways to Love Your Children & 301 Recovery Tools & Tips.

Kerry’s books include: Ashes to Beauty the Book and Ashes to Beauty the Workbook

Co-authored books include: 101 Blogs to Transform your Life, Volume I and Offended Deceived Addicted